Reader Martin Watson of Chester has taken me to task for using phrases like 'close convoy' and 'safely tucked in behind' in the context of driving in fog. And rightly so.
But I plead guilty to a lapse in writing, rather than driving, standards. 'Close convoy' was a particularly poor choice of words - although I do remember one particular motorcycle-club jaunt, across some lonely moorland, when the fog was so dense that the only way we could proceed was at walking pace with barely a bike's length between any of us.
The piece that upset Mr Watson was typed up shortly after a more recent foggy experience; but this was merely the wispy variety that cuts your speed and makes overtaking tricky - not the blanket coverage stuff. Precisely those conditions in which most drivers automatically flick on their rear high-intensity lights, even though they're not truly necessary. In this instance, a half-hour drive on a single-carriageway A-road was involved. I gradually caught up with a 'train' of cars travelling at a not-unreasonable 40 mph, and it was very obvious that the people who kept their rear foglights lit were making life thoroughly unpleasant for those behind.
The point being that, once a following driver knows that you are there, the fiery red beacons have served their immediate purpose. So, in all but really bad conditions, a considerate road user will douse them whenever another vehicle is behind (safely tucked in at a sensible distance; in convoy but definitely not too close!).
Talking about dangerous p*llocks (what are you, Landers?), how many times have you been overtaken on the motorway by a high speed Repmobile, its driver steering with one hand - the other fist wrapped around a telephone? It's illegal, of course, to use anything other than a 'hands-free' phone while on the move - but it goes on all the time. Characters in TV dramas and documentaries regularly do it, without any hint of criticism. I don't have any figures, but I've not heard of a driver being prosecuted for this offence (arguably far more dangerous than speeding on a motorway). Several years ago, however, the national press reported that a driver had been done for using a battery shaver in a slow-moving traffic queue on his way to work. This was considered to be a heinous crime back then, yet today's motorists don't think twice about playing with their executive toys at speed.
And it's not just mobile phones. Manufacturers are putting more and more high-tech gadgets into modern cars. Some stereo systems virtually require a fortnight's training to understand all their functions. The car makers love all this glitzy 'lights and buttons' stuff because these are value-added products: in other words, they cost relatively little to produce but can be sold at a high price and a fat profit. Or, looked at another way, a facia full of silicone-chipped gimmickry may make a thoroughly naff car seem suddenly desirable.
Back in 1951, John Eason Gibson - Country Life's Motoring Correspondent - wrote, "There are still mixed views about whether or not one should have a wireless on one's car. Many motorists, myself included, find a wireless set a real pleasure when they are parked, but little better than a distraction when they are actually motoring." The language may sound quaint, but Eason Gibson was not an old fuddy-duddy: he participated in motor sport (becoming Secretary of the BRDC) and he loved high performance cars. You've only got to read some of his reports to realise that he pushed his test cars pretty hard on the unrestricted roads of the day. In short, he was an enthusiast who knew how to drive and who understood the vital importance of concentration.
Meanwhile, forty-five years later, we live in a society which is apparently obsessed by safety. We have the 70mph speed limit, of course, for 'safety' reasons, and modern cars include a whole host of safety features. Indeed, classic owners are considered mildly insane for preferring to drive cars without anti-lock brakes, without impact protection, without air-bags. (My God! Without seat-belts even?) And yet - in this supposedly safety conscious world - the motorist's concentration is being steadily undermined in every possible way.
Not content with complicated heating/ventilating systems, stereos, telephones and fuel-consumption computers... Ladies and gentlemen, take your eyes off the road, please, for the very latest motoring device. It's the amazing, incredible, electronic 'route finder'!
Well, I don't know about you, but I'd rather be sharing a motorway with a driver who is lost, rather than one who is peering down at a diminutive television screen. Incidentally, the law actually had to be changed to let this one through. There was a long-standing regulation banning TV screens within the driver's line of sight, which has been amended specifically to allow a TV display of traffic and route information. Er... silly question, I know, but does it really make any difference whether the screen is showing East Enders or the East End if it takes the driver's attention away from the road?
Now they're advertising laptop computers and portable printers which plug into the cigarette lighter socket. So that bloke's not only on the phone - he's also recalculating the monthly sales figures. I do often wonder what Mr Eason Gibson would make of it all?
David Landers
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